I am Dante Antonio Valentino. As soon as I was hired I had made my way to this lodge as the emails described. Though the one detail the inscriptions seemed to overlook was the shrill voice yapping into my ears endlessly. Her mountains of questions only made the morning coffee more luring.
I glared down at Rosey as I responded to her question, “It is my work uniform. It is not a statement on my character as a person. It is simply a tool to adjust my first impressions when interacting with clients.”
She continues relentlessly, “Oh! So you’re going to work soon? When do you gotta go? I’m not keeping you am I? Like are you late right now? Going to lose your job because of me asking you about this stuff? I hope not. That would make me feel HORRIBLE. I would hate for you to get annoyed at me for something like that. We’re still good right? Like even if they fire you we can still be besties. Like what’s more fun, doing a boring old desk job or talking to ME. Am I right or am I right? Put’er there furless pal.” Rosey holds out a hand still covered by her sleeve for a handshake. I glance at it and sneer on seeing all of the lint and glitter stuck to the fibers. By now I hadn’t noticed but Wendel and Michael had left the room. Rosey was left only with me as her focus. I was thrown to the sparkle wolves so to speak.
She mutters while keeping her hand out, “Put’er there reptilian pal? Or is that offensive? Bud? Chum? What’s your pass code huh? You like being called boss? I could do that.” Her hand goes down as she continues her relentless noise, “Oh! I could be like a little henchman with my little henchman legs. Just following you around. Oh! I could also have an accent so it’s like I was sooo good at being a henchman that you imported me to this area…Oh wait I already have an accent…OH! Then it’s perfect! I already naturally fit the role! Oh my goodness! Oh wait a minute though, what henchmen would I be? The short angry one, big dumb one, or the lean scary one? I could try being tall and brooding but I can't walk all that well in heels. It’s like watching a baby fawn stumbling about. It’s EMBARRASSING. But I guess baby fawns are kinda cute. Would that make that kinda cute or dumb? I don’t know. Besides, I would miss out on these bad boys-” She suddenly slams a foot up onto the counter. She wears a childish set of white and pink sneakers with lights built into the sides, “BOOM. Light up sneakers.” She takes her foot back down leaving a scuff on the counter that I stare down at. Her words muffled in my mind as I tried to listen more to my own heartbeat pounding in my head than her maddening rambling. Nevertheless, she goes on, “I tell ya these things are a babe magnet at the club. You stand out so much more and suddenly everyone wants to talk to you. You won’t even have enough time to sit at the bar! They love that shit, especially the bouncers, and if you ask me that’s the diamond in the rough. You get in good with the bouncer after the onslaught of questions they want to ask you, and BOOM you got the biggest toughest guy at the club. They’re literally hired to be stronger than everyone else, it’s like a life hack!”
Theoretically speaking, if I was to suddenly disappear in the middle of the night and high tail it to the next town over would she find me? Then again she found Michael and followed her here. She probably has an attachment issue based on abandonment. Seeing as she’s still talking she may have latched some of that attachment to me as well. She may just grab the whole lodge and drag it with her to find me. I could start yelling obscenities in her face until she would have to hate me but Wendell might object to that action. Though that begs the question, how in the Hell did Michael put up with this shit. She’s hard to hear with how quiet she speaks and seems a gentle breeze away from sobbing when around Rosey. Perhaps Michael was just a pushover. She matched the same traits of ones I had met before.
Though if I don’t stop Rosey from going on now, I don’t think it’s ever going to end. Her attachment is probably multiplying every second this goes on. Better to interrupt her now than have developed chronic tinnitus in one sitting. If I do respond however I will at least try to show no interest in her. Bland and cold tones only until she can learn how to stop talking.
I took a deep breath and only responded to the first statement as the rest was gibberish to me, “I am at my job. I look like a butler or sorts because I am one. Maybe pick up on some context clues next time, dear.”
She nods with an ever present smile, “Oh I knew you were when you woke up early to make breakfast for everyone you hate. No one that grumpy wakes up that early for people like this. I just wanted to talk about it while I could.”
Bothered, I gave her a look, “I am only grumpy when you are here to witness it mind you.”
“The crying I heard this morning said otherwise. If you need some self help tips I know this GREAT craft. It’s like this little beer cozy and it even has your name on it in foam stickers. How cool is that?”
All emotion was devoid from me, “Not in the slightest. Don’t you have somewhere to be?”
She looked down at her phone as her eyes widened. She bolted up from her seat in such a rush that I could have sworn I saw some glitter escape her hair, “SHIT! You’re right, I gotta go! I have a nail appointment at that nail salon downtown.I’ll talk at ya later, Diggy Dawny.”
I turned my chin up and away from her with annoyance as she rushed out of the lodge. The door started to swing shut behind her before Wendell caught it with one hand. He walked in and immediately looked my way, “Got you something to clean. Come on.” he gave a glance around as if to be sure no one else was around anymore.
A bit of worry lingered in my mind over this job. Why would janitorial work have such a high pay or a lodge like this? I mean I could understand if Rosey was expected to be staying here with all of the glitter. Surely it was something else entirely.
I walked out from behind the counter of the kitchen and followed Wendell to another room. Wendell’s room In particular.